Not taking one’s own advice is bad form, but I’m okay now!

I promised an update, so here you go, people who want to hear about the general state of my cunt!

As with the last post, lots of personal bodily things discussed.  My next post will be sexy and/or mythological, so hold out for that if you like!

I haven’t been to the doctor, and it seems that was actually a perfectly okay decision.  I don’t actually know what was up with me – possibly just some slight tearing and irritation – but I tried out a couple of things on myself and stayed off it, so to speak, for about five days.

So what are these home remedies that do not, I repeat, DO NOT replace actual medical care?  (Seriously, if my sister or mum or best friend called me up and said she was that out-of-sorts I would tell her to consult someone with more medical training than I.  Big disclaimer.)

To start with, we’ve probably all heard about cranberry juice for a UTI.  I’ve never tried this before, and it’s been years since I’ve even had to think of dealing with one.  Last one I had, there was the usual frequent urination but at the same time never feeling like you’re “done” after, and a slight irritation.  Usually, they hurt more, so I thought nothing of it and went about my business for a couple of weeks.  Then I had extreme pain in my lower back, bad enough I couldn’t stand up straight and certainly couldn’t go to work.  I did go to the doctor for that, and found out I’d left it long enough that the infection had traveled to my kidneys.  Kidney infection is in my top 10 for pain.  So, that being my last experience, I am wary now.  I still tried out cranberry juice, just to see, and who knows?  Maybe it wasn’t that at all.  By juice, I mean actual cranberry juice.  No sugar, and not the “cocktail” mixtures that are mostly grape or apple.  It’s tart.

And here’s an interesting one: yoghurt.  I eat it anyway, but I’ve found that plenty of ladies swear by internal application in addition to the regular food-type usage.  Again, NO SUGAR!  This made me giggle inwardly a bit.  You shouldn’t put anything with sugar in it inside yourself anyway (unless you’re eating it, which I find should be done sparingly.) because: yeast.  The giggle was because yeast added to sugar causes fermentation.  Which led to me thinking of people being able to literally get drunk off me.  Let’s keep that in the “poetic metaphor” realm, though.

So, daily applications of plain yoghurt, the idea being that the “good” bacteria in it would fight off any “bad” bacteria that’s trying to colonize you, like the British in India (and everywhere else; India is just shaped roughly the right way for that image to work).  I have to say, just the cool feeling is very soothing.  But also, by last night (Thursday) I felt fine and was ready to go in for a more thorough check.  Internally, I have one tiny painful spot and that’s it.  Probably a slight tear, or a much worse bruise than I’d initially realised that is taking longer than usual to heal, but overall I’m about back to my typical state. Just in time for the weekend.

So, that may or may not be handy useful information for someone.  For me, it just shows that I really shouldn’t be so hard on myself over these things.  I do hate feeling like I’ve failed, but as I’ve said I also know that that’s my own problem.  No one is actually making me feel like this, and no one is demanding anything other than what I am already capable of and, more importantly, enjoy.  Someday I’ll look back on this phase of my life, when I would gladly hurt myself trying to live up to the ideals other women have planted in my partners’ minds, and laugh at it but also feel sad that I let myself feel so miserable and treat myself so badly over it.  I want that day to be right now, but realistically it’s not, so I just have to be more careful about allowing my body to be harmed, or allowing myself to hate it.  Even if it can’t do everything someone else wants it to, I have to learn to accept that and not cry so much over not being able to live up to external standards.  Someday, my own standards will be more important.